Original dark fiction and horror stories, authored and illustrated by myself, Timothy J. Whitcher, as well as updates on my creative projects. Also contains my musings on writing, both fiction and non-fiction, movies, comics and the paranormal... and anything else I damn well please.
Daniel pulled the near-new Ford pickup into the
drive of the modest ranch style home and waited. He didn’t bother tooting the
horn. His brother Gabriel would know he was there, like every workday morning.
He surveyed the front lawn in mild disgust. Plastic toys lay abandoned for days
by Gabe’s two girls. The yard more weeds than grass, needed mowing. It was
embarrassing. At least Gabe’s wife June kept the house neat and the girls
behaved. Just as Daniel was about to lose his temper, Gabriel made his appearance.
With one hand holding open the aluminum screen door and the other holding the
knob of the front door, Gabriel obediently took instructions from June; his
pudgy six-foot frame towering over her petite stature. Just as Daniel was about
to toot the horn out of impatience, Gabriel leaned in for the kiss. Daniel
shook his head as he read his brother’s lips: ‘I love you.’ This scenario
played out the same nearly every day, but this morning it annoyed him more than
Gabriel lumbered around the back of the pickup,
opened the passenger side and hoisted himself into the cloying warmth of the
cab. Daniel looked at him hard, and though not the first time, thought of looking
into a funhouse mirror. Gabriel was Daniel’s identical twin, however, where Daniel
was fit and trim, somewhere along the line in thirty years Gabriel had put on
an additional fifty pounds. Where Daniel still had his hair, Gabriel’s had
decided to recede with a vengeance a la Richard Nixon. Gabe’s wardrobe was a
mix of old and new: old blue-jeans stained near black in spots from hydraulic
fluid, plaid shirt repaired with patches at the elbows, brand new tan leather
high-top work boots bought by Daniel himself as a belated birthday gift; as
opposed to Daniel’s neatly matching denim work shirt, pants and jacket,
finished off with new work boots, kin to the ones his brother wore, the second
half of a two for one sale. To top it off, Daniel thought, Gabriel wore a
dirty, blue nylon down vest.
Daniel powered down
the window despite the cool damp air, letting the rush of the wind fill in for
idle conversation. He was put off this morning and really didn’t give a damn to
hear what his brother had to say, which usually wasn’t much anyway. Within
minutes they were pulling into the gated drive of Pine Woods Cemetery, the
largest cemetery in their sleepy little town. Daniel was careful to stay on the
narrow asphalt path that wended its way through the myriad of grave markers,
many well over a century old, as the ground was as wet as a sponge from the
heavy spring rains. Daniel sighed as Gabriel droned on about nothing; Daniel
guessed just satisfied to hear himself talk.
of last night’s reality TV show came to an abrupt halt as the tranquil view
yielded to chaos. At least a dozen headstones had been toppled in the oldest
section of the graveyard. Daniel cursed, Gabriel gaped in silence as they
looked over the carnage. This was the third time in so many months that vandals
had struck. It had been Daniel’s fantasy to catch them in the act and beat them
to a bloody pulp and he felt he’d been denied the opportunity once again.
This is all we need. It’ll take a good day’s work to reset these. At least it’s
not the newer ones. People get real up in arms when it’s the newer ones. As if
the poor bastards in the old graves aren’t just as dead,” said Daniel.
“Geez o’ Pete, they’re
all worthy of respect, Danny,” said Gabriel, quietly.
for the living, Gabe. And few of the living get my respect.”
Gabriel kept silent. He could feel his brother’s
anger simmering just below the surface.
“So, we’re finishing up the Winkler plot, right?”
Gabriel said, as if his brother needed reminding.
“Yeah, genius. Better get to it. Calls for rain
this afternoon. Goddamn, ground’s wet enough already. Rained nearly every frigging
day the last two weeks. River gets much higher, it’ll be pulling vaults from
It had happened before. Burial vaults pulled out
from the eroding shoreline. Some graves so old that their caskets had rotted to
nothing, earth stained skulls and bones having to be retrieved from the Pine
River, and then cremated. That was a job that Daniel knew he’d assign to Gabe,
when or if the time came.
brought the lumbering pick up to a stop just past a stand of pine trees, which
revealed the plot they would be digging. The day before they’d had just enough
time to measure the plot, lay out plywood sheeting, remove sod, cover the sod
with tarp and move the Cat backhoe
into place before the sky let loose; a torrential rain driving them from the
site. Daniel had stewed all the way to Gabe’s, while Gabe spoke with pride
about attending his twin daughter’s dance recital that evening, totally
oblivious to his brother’s agitated state. Daniel had spent the night drinking
in his extravagant yet lonely home set deep in the countryside, cursing the
weather. Well, today wasn’t going to be a pleasant day either, Daniel thought,
but damn it all to hell, he was going to get the job done. The deceased in the cement
vault sat waiting for its internment on plywood sheeting, the family already
deprived of a proper funeral. If that wasn’t bad enough, the vault was
vulnerable to vandalism and they’d been lucky that the vandals hadn’t noticed
it last night. Daniel guessed that the stand of pines must’ve hid the vault
from sight. It would’ve been pretty hard dealing with the City Commisioner if
they’d found it desecrated this morning.
Daniel fired up the Cat and began digging as Gabe
stood to the side, shovel at the ready to keep the growing pile of earth spread
neatly on the plywood, as always. He never ran the backhoe. Danny had always
been too impatient to show him how. Gabe was glad. He knew if anything were to
go wrong with it, he’d be blamed, somehow. Daniel hollered at Gabe every so
often, with increasing agitation, for Gabe to stay off the grass; Gabe’s boots
damaging the muddy turf. Gabe was doing all he could not to. He could never
understand why his brother always had to be so critical of him, to lose his
temper. The weather wasn’t his fault, and he wanted the job done as much as
Danny did. Gabe hoped that no one from the deceased’s family would show up. He
knew it would be up to him to be the level-headed one. The diplomatic one. If
they were to show up, Gabe hoped Danny could control his anger. At least Danny
was sober today.
“Gabe! Don’t make me tell you again! Keep off that
goddamned grass!” bellowed Daniel from the backhoe.
Gabe gave him a weary look.
“Let me measure Danny,” called Gabe.
He measured the hole for depth. Two feet to go.
Now came the hard part. Gabe knew they’d need to dig the rest by hand. If they
tried to dig further with the Cat, it
was possible that the lip of the hole would collapse due to the dampness of the
“Four feet,” said Gabe.
“Measure it over. I’m not getting back on this
“Four feet, four inches, okay?”
Without another word, Daniel jumped off the
backhoe, slipping and tearing a deep three-foot-long gouge into the muddy lawn.
Gabe watched with neutral expression as Danny’s face
became redder and redder; Gabe looking away as his twin brother flew into a
rage, expletives flying thick as mosquitos in July. He’d heard it all before
and was just grateful that it wasn’t aimed at him. Gabe was just as grateful
that his twin girls weren’t here for the barrage, like they had been Easter
Sunday. After five minutes of tirade, Danny suddenly stopped, took a deep
breath and began unloading the equipment they’d need from the back of the
truck, as if nothing had happened. Gabe wanted to shake his head in amazement
and disgust, but feared to. Gabriel just pretended nothing had transpired as
They went to task. Gabe retrieved the step ladder
from the bed of the pick up after Daniel’s prompting, Daniel setting up the gas
powered generator and sump pump to pump out the five or so inches of water that
had seeped into the four foot hole. He set the ladder in, and with Daniel’s
reminder, stepped off well from the edge of the hole as not to cause the wall
to cave-in. He was about to ask Danny why they weren’t shoring up the walls of
the grave with plywood, but thought better of it. He knew that Danny would
either berate him for the idea, or would take off in the truck in anger to
retrieve the boards. Gabe just wanted to be done with it.
Gabe’s boots sank into the sodden earth up to the
laces; muddy water nearly at the tops. The sump pump ran noisily. He grabbed
the hose from Danny and fed it into the water, careful not to let mud clog the
“Don’t let mud clog that hose again,” said Daniel,
supervising from a squat, balancing with the dirt caked shovel.
Gabe had let it clog the first time he’d used it.
That was a good dozen times ago, Gabe thought. Danny couldn’t let anything go.
He kept silent, concentrating on the job.
“It’s Friday. You and Sandra got plans?” Gabe realized his
misstep as soon as the words escaped his lips.
to be funny, Gabe? You know I dumped that bitch. Is that your idea of a joke,
Mr. Family Man? You’re a real piece of work. Then, I didn’t marry the first
piece that bothered to look my way, did I? Nope. My dumbass brother threw it
all away right out of High School. Bet you wish you were me every night, don’t
you? Tied to the old apron strings, just like our ol’ man,” Danny ranted.
“Geez, I forgot she left, okay?” said Gabe,
concentrating harder on the end of the hose, unable to move, his feet cast in
thick mud like wet cement.
“Left? Holy fuck. Is that what that wife of yours
“No,” said Gabe, trying to think of something to
say, something that would diffuse the situation, but instead, he blurted out
what was running through his mind in a loop.
“How’d she get that broken arm, then?”
all the courage he could muster, Gabe turned to look Danny dead in the eye.
Daniel’s face was deep red, veins bulging from his forehead, lips tight as a
stretched rubber band, nostrils flared; Gabe could hear the rush of Danny’s
breath in and out. Then deep from Danny’s gut rose a bellow of rage that even
through all his years of torment Gabe had never heard from his twin brother
before, shattering the quiet of the cemetery air; Daniel still in a squat, both
hands now gripping the shovel handle which rested across his knees. In one
swift, savage motion, Daniel swung the shovel with all his might, the blade
connecting with the side of Gabe’s head. Gabe’s whole body torqued from the
force, his head twisting on his neck then recoiling back as if spring loaded. A
pain like the sting of a dozen hornets blossomed in his brain. A fierce buzzing
like a giant tuning fork had been struck, just like the times Danny used to
throw him hard onto the cement slab kitchen floor when they were just kids. Gabe
bounced off the far wall of the grave, hitting the muck face first.
stood, shovel still in hand, his chest heaving, and looked down at his twin. He
watched as Gabe tried to sit up, grasping at the air. Gabe shook his head.
Blood splattered against the aluminum ladder. He grabbed hold of the ladder and
brought himself up to a kneeling position, then sat back on his calves. Danny
watched as blood flowed onto Gabe’s mud covered down vest. The blood looked
surreal, almost fake on the bright blue material.
“Kripes almighty! What was that?” said Gabe,
Within seconds, Gabe knew what had happened. He
looked up at his brother with an expression of disbelief.
“Help me out, Danny. Think I’m hurt bad,” said
Gabe, attempting to stand.
Daniel stood still, silent, a cold hard look on
his face. He knew he’d fucked up royally. He was screwed. Gabe wouldn’t lie for
him this time. This wasn’t a punch in the gut, or a bruised or cracked rib.
Shit, Gabe might even die, thought Daniel. He’d lose it all. The business. His
house. Hell, if Gabe died, his freedom. His brother had held him back all these
years. He’d have made twice the money if he hadn’t had to split everything with
Gabe. He’d been cornered into that agreement by his Father’s will. If he wanted
to inherit the business, Gabriel would be in it for half. Without another
thought, Daniel raised the shovel, and with machine like precision, brought the
shovel blade down again and again, the shovel ringing with every blow. He
didn’t know how many times. It was the lightning strike and roll of thunder
that brought him back to reality.
Gabe lay crumpled at the bottom of the grave.
Daniel had a lot of work ahead of him. Dark work.
Daniel tossed the shovel into the hole and climbed
down the step ladder. He gazed up into the sky, watching the storm clouds in
the distance. Another flash and peel of thunder made him jump. He stepped back
onto his brother’s hand. A hand that looked identical to his own. Danny
gingerly repositioned his feet, trying hard not to touch his brother. He was
determined to not look at the body, but it was impossible not to. Even his
peripheral vision betrayed him. He realized he was hyperventilating. He knew he
needed to get a grip if he were to get through this. He took in long deep
breaths; the first through his nostrils, the sharp tang of fresh blood made him
gag. He counted. Fifty deep breaths. He felt better. His mind clearer. He
looked at his watch. How long had he been in the hole? A cold realization
flowed through him like ice water. The longer this took, the more likely he’d
be caught. Gabe’s wife could show up. A visitor to the cemetery. Hell, even a
cop. He began to dig. Danny dug and dug. The brown muddy earth didn’t give up
easily. Muddy clay and water sucked at the shovel and his boots. Pushing
himself harder, he struggled with each sodden shovel full, which he had to pitch
out of the grave and onto the pile above. At first he was careful not to sling
the mud haphazardly on the grass, but as each scoop became more difficult, each
sling more frantic, the turf above was splattered with a thick layer of clay.
It started to rain. Just a light drizzle. Daniel
welcomed the cool comfort of the water on his red, hot face. He looked skyward
for the first time in what his watch said had been over an hour. He’d made some
progress. A two foot deep by four foot wide hole lay before him. He’d need to
go a bit deeper, since he’d decided to bury his brother’s corpse in the fetal
position. That would mean another six inches deep. Daniel discarded his jacket.
It couldn’t have been more than sixty degrees out, yet he was burning up from
the exertion; also it gave him the excuse of using it to cover his brother’s
body. He turned and while looking aside, cast the jacket over Gabe’s bludgeoned
head. He watched as blood blossomed through the material. The jacket couldn’t
disguise the unnatural shape of Gabe’s head, but at least his eyes were
covered. His blind, staring, accusing eyes. Danny wiped the sweat and rain from
his brow with the back of his gritty hand. An image of how he must look flashed
through his mind. Face greasy, dirty and wet; eyes watering and wide. He had to
get out of here, get home and clean up. Get home and figure out his next step.
He realized he’d been gripping the shovel handle so hard that his hand had
begun to ache.
Daniel turned back to the task, driving the shovel
into the murky mess. A sound like a cannon hit him. Brightest day exploded
bringing the blackest of shadows. Shocked, he stumbled backwards. For a
millisecond he thought he’d been shot. Danny tripped on his brother’s legs and
fell back, sitting hard into Gabe’s lap. He groped for a handhold to slow his
momentum but only found the fabric of his discarded jacket, yanking the
bloodied denim from his brother’s ruined face. Danny hit the back wall of the
grave, chunks of gray-brown earth rained down on him. He sputtered and blinked
as the soil invaded his mouth and eyes. He could feel the soft yielding flesh
of Gabe’s legs underneath him. He could smell blood like raw meat, could smell sour
sweat, feces. More lightning, followed almost instantly by booming thunder,
ripped the sky. Purple-black clouds boiled overhead. Danny tried to scramble to
his feet, the slick clay slewing under his boots. His tired muscles struggled.
He was panicking. Flailing arms, his grasping hands finding no purchase,
fingers clawing clumps of sticky muck from the walls. He gave in. Gave up. Fell
back against the earthen wall, panting, shaking. The sky opened up. Hard
driving rain hit him like silver nails, stinging his cheeks, the backs of his
hands. Rain pelted Gabe’s nylon vest with a manic rattle. The aluminum ladder
shook with the force. Danny watched helplessly as the hole he’d dug began to
skim over with water, rain shattering the surface like a hammer on a mirror.
Danny fought to get back on his feet but in his
reclined position, his back angled against the wall, thighs hiked up over the
flabby thighs of his brother’s corpse, it seemed an impossibility. He would
have to turn on his side and get one leg under him. Closing his eyes against
the onslaught of rain, Danny reached for a hand-hold on anything within reach
and reluctantly grasped his brother’s jeans pocket. He pulled hard while
pushing his other hand under him into the watery grave. Danny felt hard bone
and cold flesh press against his forehead. Opening his eyes, his gaze was met
by Gabe’s empty stare, his limp fleshy lips pushed against Danny’s mouth in an
obscene kiss. Danny could smell the bile on the corpse’s breath as the last
gasp of putrid air was forced from lungs and stomach. Danny screamed,
frantically trying to push the weight of his twin’s body off of him, the dead
weight driving him down, pinning him. He twisted on his side, sliding from
under the smothering weight, bringing himself to an upright position. The
relentless rain pounded on. Despite the rain, Daniel sat unblinking at the
realization that the grave was quickly filling with water. At least six inches
of opaque brown water nearly hid his calves from view. He needed to get out.
Get up the ladder. He knew what he’d do. The Cat. He’d get out, drive it into the
hole, and make up a story how it was all an accident. It could work. He’d be
done with Gabe. He’d come out of this okay.
It was as if God or the devil had read his mind. Daniel
crawled forward and just as he pulled himself up on the ladder, the earth gave
way in front of the backhoe. Daniel watched incredulously as the three ton
piece of equipment tottered on the edge of the grave, chunks of dirt flowing in
around the ladder in an avalanche. There was nothing he could do, no room to
move. He watched in horror as the steel toothed bucket, grinning its shiny
earth polished grin like some mechanical T-rex, slid inevitably toward him. The
backhoe tilted ever so slowly forward, the heavy bucket effortlessly took the
ladder from his hands and crushed it like a foil gum wrapper into the side of
the grave. But like a dissatisfied, spoiled child it slid on, wanting more than
the lifeless metal. Danny stumbled back once again, grabbing up the shovel and
leveraging it between the bucket head and the dirt wall. The handle snapped,
exposing white splinters like fractured bone. The bucket kept on course. Danny
sat hard beside his twin with an explosion of mud. The mud dripped from the steel
teeth of the bucket like blood. Its idiot grin pushed on. Danny watched helpless
as the inevitable took place. He felt the rigid metal press into him, the
bucket driving into his chest. The backhoe groaned as the front wheel slid on
the slope of earth now burying his legs. He pushed himself back against Gabe’s
body, in an attempt to escape being crushed alive. The bucket bit into him. He
felt and heard a rib snap. A groan that should have been a scream escaped him.
He could barely breathe in or out. Then it stopped. He was pinned, but the
bucket had stopped. The backhoe had settled into place.
The rain pissed on and on. Daniel’s teeth
chattered from the cold and wet. He’d lost track of time. He couldn’t look at
his watch; his right arm was pinned beneath him. The rising water was at his
armpits. In a couple of hours, it would be at his chin. He prayed to God for
the rain to stop. He prayed to God that he be rescued. He prayed to God for
forgiveness. The rain kept on. He swore at God and prayed to the devil. He reluctantly
rested his head against Gabe’s. His fatigued neck muscles could no longer support
the weight of his head. Gabe’s teeth scraped against his ear. Danny’s labored
breathing was like a metronome; the only sound other than the continuous rush
Daniel awoke, startled. His predicament came
flooding back to the forefront of his consciousness. His jaw ached, teeth
chattering like a wind up monkey. Skin on his face raw from the beating deluge.
The rest of his body was numb. Water lapped at his neck. Hypothermia would soon
be upon him. The sky was near dark. Evening had crept in like a feral black
cat. Gabe’s body had actually floated up a few inches beside him. Ripped flesh
now bloodless and deep pink, water streaming over teeth, gums and slack lips.
Just as Danny thought all was lost, he saw lights
swing above his head, illuminating the towering pines with a bright amber glow,
reflecting off the sheeting rain. A car. They’d realize something was
wrong.It must be June, he thought,
looking for Gabe. Wondering why he wasn’t home. She’d come to find Gabe! Please God, I’ll tell her everything…
but why should he? There’d been an accident, that’s all. The bucket had crushed
Gabe’s head, then pinned him in place. He’d make her believe him. He heard a
car door open and close. Then another.
The boys got out of the old Camaro, leaving it running.
Johnny wasn’t born yesterday. His Momma didn’t raise no fool. He and Ray headed
for the new Ford pickup.
“Shit, Johnny! The dumbass left the keys in it!”
They both brayed laughter as Ray jumped in and
fired up the truck.
“Mother fucker! Let me drive!” whined Johnny.
“Finders keepers bitch,” said Ray with a toothy grin,
Ray took off in the truck down the cemetery path
as fast as he could, swiping three headstones as he went, followed closely
behind by Johnny’s Camaro. This beat the shit out of tipping gravestones,
thought Johnny, elated.
Daniel could barely make out voices. He tried to
shout, but could do nothing but wheeze out a croak. He heard his truck start,
followed by nothing but the sound of pouring rain. It hadn’t been June. Someone
just stole his truck! Fury boiled Daniel’s brain, his face growing hot with
rage. A jagged pain ripped through his chest. He forced himself to calm down.
Survival was all that mattered. More time passed. Daniel didn’t know how much.
He slipped in and out of consciousness. He could feel little but the aching
throb in his chest. In a moment of lucidity, he noticed that the rain was
tapering off. He truly thought he was going to drown, but now that the rain was
stopping, he felt there may be hope after all. Hope was all he had. Even his
face was numb now. He had to keep his head leaned back as far as possible to
keep the brackish water out of his mouth. He was afraid to close his eyes, watching
for headlights, since he was sure that his only salvation was that June would
eventually come looking for Gabe. Gabe, who’s battered and torn face loomed
over him, backlit by a field of stars in the clearing sky.
“Have to give it to you, Gabe. You just may have
beaten me,” Danny thought. Gabe didn’t answer. The silence was galling to
Danny. “You always were a pain in my ass. You’ll be one to the very end…”
Danny’s thoughts were interrupted as once again the tree
line was illuminated by headlights. Danny knew it had to be June.
June had waited as long as she was willing to. She
hated to dog Gabe like some worried old hen. It wasn’t like Gabe not to call if
he were to be late, nor was it like him to not answer his cell. She supposed he
could’ve forgotten to charge it, but where was he? And now here she was in the
cemetery. There was the backhoe. She saw that it was at an odd angle. Danny,
probably pushing too hard as usual, must’ve gotten too close to the edge. She
never could figure out why Gabe didn’t drive it; he was much more responsible.
Well, Danny’s truck wasn’t here. Damn Danny. He must’ve convinced Gabe to quit
for the day, and then sit out the storm at the Barley House Tavern, or some
other God-forsaken dive. If she didn’t have such good news for them, she’d
probably be angry. She’d drive over to the bar and surprise them there. They’d
be ecstatic once they heard that their lottery number had finally hit. She
couldn’t believe their good fortune.
The beams paused for three or so minutes as Danny
waited to hear the car door, then June’s frantic call for Gabe, followed by her
shocked expression as she gazed over the edge of the grave. But he didn’t hear
anything but the idle of the old Buick. Didn’t hear the desperate call. Didn’t
see the shocked expression. Instead, the headlights swung away, the sound of
the motor faded. Danny watched as the stars winked out. Heard the rain, felt the
It was a large cellar, entirely out of proportion to the house above it. The owner admitted that it was probably built for a distinctly different kind of structure from the one which rose above it. Probably the first house had been burned, and poverty had caused a diminution of the dwelling erected to take its place.
A winding stone stairway connected the cellar with the kitchen. Around the base of this series of steps successive owners of the house had placed their firewood, winter vegetables and junk. The junk had gradually been pushed back till it rose, head high, in a barricade of uselessness. What was back of that barricade no one knew and no one cared. For some hundreds of years no one had crossed it to penetrate to the black reaches of the cellar behind it.
At the top of the steps, separating the kitchen from the cellar, was a stout oaken door. This door was, in a way, as peculiar and out of relation to the rest of the house as the cellar. It was a strange kind of door to find in a modern house, and certainly a most unusual door to find in the inside of the house—thick, stoutly built, dexterously rabbeted together with huge wrought-iron hinges, and a lock that looked as though it came from Castle Despair. Separating a house from the outside world, such a door would be excusable; swinging between kitchen and cellar it seemed peculiarly inappropriate.
From the earliest months of his life Tommy Tucker seemed unhappy in the kitchen. In the front parlor, in the formal dining-room, and especially on the second floor of the house he acted like a normal, healthy child; but carry him to the kitchen, he at once began to cry. His parents, being plain people, ate in the kitchen save when they had company. Being poor, Mrs. Tucker did most of her work, though occasionally she had a charwoman in to do the extra Saturday cleaning, and thus much of her time was spent in the kitchen. And Tommy stayed with her, at least as long as he was unable to walk. Much of the time he was decidedly unhappy.
When Tommy learned to creep, he lost no time in leaving the kitchen. No sooner was his mother's back turned than the little fellow crawled as fast as he could for the doorway opening into the front of the house, the dining-room and the front parlor. Once away from the kitchen, he seemed happy; at least, he ceased to cry. On being returned to the kitchen his howls so thoroughly convinced the neighbors that he had colic that more than one bowl of catnip and sage tea was brought to his assistance.
It was not until the boy learned to talk that the Tuckers had any idea as to what made the boy cry so hard when he was in the kitchen. In other words, the baby had to suffer for many months till he obtained at least a little relief, and even when he told his parents what was the mattet, they were absolutely unable to comprehend. This is not to be wondered at because they were both hard-working, rather simple-minded persons.
What they finally learned from their little son was this: that if the cellar door was shut and securely fastened with the heavy iron Tommy could at least eat a meal in peace; if the door was simply closed and not locked, he shivered with fear, but kept quiet; but if the door was open, if even the slightest streak of black showed that it was not tightly shut, then the little three-year-old would scream himself to the point of exhaustion, especially if his tired father would refuse him permission to leave the kitchen.
Playing in the kitchen, the child developed two interesting habits. Rags, scraps of paper and splinters of wood were continually being shoved under the thick oak door to fill the space between the door and the sill. Whenever Mrs. Tucker opened the door there was always some trash there, placed by her son. It annoyed her, and more than once the little fellow was thrashed for this conduct, but punishment acted in no way as a deterrent. The other habit was as singular. Once the door was closed and locked, he would rather boldly walk over to it and caress the old lock. Even when he was so small that he had to stand on tiptoe to touch it with the tips of his fingers he would touch it with slow caressing strokes; later on, as he grew, he used to kiss it.
His father, who only saw the boy at the end of the day, decided that there was no sense in such conduct, and in his masculine way tried to break the lad of his foolishness. There was, of necessity, no effort on the part of the hard-working man to understand the psychology back of his son's conduct. All that the man knew was that his little son was acting in a way that was decidedly queer.
Tommy loved his mother and was willing to do anything he could to help her in the household chores, but one thing he would not do, and never did do, and that was to fetch and carry between the house and the cellar. If his mother opened the door, he would run screaming from the room, and he never returned voluntarily till he was assured that the door was closed.
He never explained just why he acted as he did. In fact, he refused to talk about it, at least to his parents, and that was just as well, because had he done so, they would simply have been more positive than ever that there was something wrong with their only child. They tried, in their own ways, to break the child of his unusual habits; failing to change him at all, they decided to ignore his peculiarities.
That is, they ignored them till he became six years old and the time came for him to go to school. He was a sturdy little chap by that time, and more intelligent than the usual boys beginning in the primer class. Mr. Tucker was, at times, proud of him; the child's attitude toward the cellar door was the one thing most disturbing to the father's pride. Finally nothing would do but that the Tucker family call on the neighborhood physician. It was an important event in the life of the Tuckers, so important that it demanded the wearing of Sunday clothes, and all that sort of thing.
"The matter is just this, Doctor Hawthorn," said Mr. Tucker, in a somewhat embarrassed manner. "Our little Tommy is old enough to start to school, but he behaves childish in regard to our cellar, and the missus and I thought you could tell us what to do about it. It must be his nerves."
Ever since he was a baby," continued Mrs. Tucker, taking up the thread of conversation where her husband had paused, "Tommy has had a great fear of the cellar. Even now, big boy that he is, he does not love me enough to fetch and carry for me through that door and down those steps. It is not natural for a child to act like he does, and what with chinking the cracks with rags and kissing the lock, he drives me to the point where I fear he may become daft-like as he grows older."
The doctor, eager to satisfy new customers, and dimly remembering some lectures on the nervous system received when he was a medical student, asked some general questions, listened to the boy's heart, examined his lungs and looked at his eyes and fingernails. At last he commented:
"Looks like a fine, healthy boy to me."
"Yes, all except the cellar door," replied the father.
"Has he ever been sick?"
"Naught but fits once or twice when he cried himself blue in the face," answered the mother.
"Perhaps. It was always in the kitchen."
"Suppose you go out and let me talk to Tommy by myself?"
And there sat the doctor very much at his ease and the little six-year-old boy very uneasy.
"Tommy, what is there in the cellar you are afraid of?"
"I don't know."
"Have you ever seen it?"
"Ever heard it? smelt it?"
"Then how do you know there is something there?"
"Because there is."
That was as far as Tommy would go, and at last his seeming obstinacy annoyed the physician even as it had for several years annoyed Mr. Tucker. He went to the door and called the parents into the office.
"He thinks there is something down in the cellar," he stated.
The Tuckers simply looked at each other.
"That's foolish," commented Mr. Tucker.
" 'Tis just a plain cellar with junk and firewood and cider barrels in it," added Mrs. Tucker. "Since we moved into that house, I have not missed a day without going down those stone steps and I know there is nothing there. But the lad has always screamed when the door was open. I recall now that since he was a child in arms he has always screamed when the door was open."
"He thinks there is something there," said the doctor.
"That is why we brought him to you," replied the father. "It's the child's nerves. Perhaps foetida, or something, will calm him."
"I tell you what to do," advised the doctor. "He thinks there is something there. Just as soon as he finds that he is wrong and that there is nothing there, he will forget about it. He has been humored too much. What you want to do is to open that cellar door and make him stay by himself in the kitchen. Nail the door open so he can not close it. Leave him alone there for an hour and then go and laugh at him and show him how silly it was for him to be afraid of an empty cellar. I will give you some nerve and blood tonic and that will help, but the big thing is to show him that there is nothing to be afraid of."
On the way back to the Tucker home Tommy broke away from his parents. They caught him after an exciting chase and kept him between them the rest of the way home. Once in the house he disappeared and was found in the guest room under the bed. The afternoon being already spoiled for Mr. Tucker, he determined to keep the child under observation for the rest of the day. Tommy ate no supper, in spite of the urgings of the unhappy mother. The dishes were washed, the evening paper read, the evening pipe smoked; and then, and only then, did Mr. Tucker take down his tool box and get out a hammer and some long nails.
"And I am going to nail the door open, Tommy, so you can not close it, as that was what the doctor said. Tommy, and you are to be a man and stay here in the kitchen alone for an hour, and we will leave the lamp a-burning, and then when you find there is naught to be afraid of, you will be well and a real man and not something for a man to be ashamed of being the father of."
But at the last Mrs. Tucker kissed Tommy and cried and whispered to her husband not to do it, and to wait till the boy was larger; but nothing was to do except to nail the thick door open so it could not be shut and leave the boy there alone with the lamp burning and the dark open space of the doorway to look at with eyes that grew as hot and burning as the flame of the lamp.
That same day Doctor Hawthorn took supper with a classmate of his, a man who specialized in psychiatry and who was particularly interested in children. Hawthorn told Johnson about his newest case, the little Tucker boy, and asked him for his opinion, lohnson frowned.
"Children are odd, Hawthorn. Perhaps they are like dogs. It may be their nervous system is more acute than in the adult. We know that our eyesight is limited, also our hearing and smell. I firmly believe that there are forms of life which exist in such a form that we can neither see, hear nor smell them. Fondly we delude ourselves into the fallacy of believing that they do not exist because we can not prove their existence. This Tucker lad may have a nervous system that is peculiarly acute. He may dimly appreciate the existence of something in the cellar which is unappreciable to his parents. Evidently there is some basis to this fear of his. Now, I am not saying that there is anything in the cellar. In fact, I suppose that it is just an ordinary cellar, but this boy, since he was a baby, has thought that there was something there, and that is just as bad as though there actually were. What I would like to know is what makes him think so. Give me the address, and I will call tomorrow and have a talk with the little fellow."
"What do you think of my advice?"
"Sorry, old man, but I think it was perfectly rotten. If I were you, I would stop around there on my way home and prevent them from following it. The little fellow may be badly frightened. You see, he evidently thinks there is something there."
"But there isn't."
"Perhaps not. No doubt, he is wrong, but he thinks so."
It all worried Doctor Hawthorn so much that he decided to take his friend's advice. It was a cold night, a foggy night, and the physician felt cold as he tramped along the London streets. At last he came to the Tucker house. He remembered now that he had been there once before, long ago, when little Tommy Tucker came Into the world. There was a light in the front window, and in no time at all Mr. Tucker came to the door.
"I have come to see Tommy," said the doctor.
"He is back in the kitchen," replied the father.
"He gave one cry, but since then he has been quiet," sobbed the wife.
"If I had let her have her way, she would have opened the door, but I said to her, 'Mother, now is the time to make a man out of our Tommy.' And I guess he knows by now that there was naught to be afraid of. Well, the hour is up. Suppose we go and get him and put him to bed?"
"It has been a hard time for the little child," whispered the wife.
Carrying the candle, the man walked ahead of the woman and the doctor, and at last opened the kitchen door. The room was dark.
"Lamp has gone out," said the man. "Wait till I light it."
"Tommy! Tommy!" called Mrs. Tucker.
But the doctor ran to where a white form was stretched on the floor. Sharply he called for more light. Trembling, he examined all that was left of little Tommy. Twitching, he looked into the open space down into the cellar. At last he looked at Tucker and Tucker's wife.
"Tommy—Tommy has been hurt—I guess he is dead!" he stammered.
The mother threw herself on the floor and picked up the torn, mutilated thing that had been, only a little while ago, her little Tommy.
The man took his hammer and drew out the nails and closed the door and locked it and then drove in a long spike to reinforce the lock. Then he took hold of the doctor's shoulders and shook him.
"What killed him, Doctor? What killed him?" he shouted into Hawthorn's ear.
The doctor looked at him bravely in spite of the fear in his throat.
"How do I know, Tucker?" he replied. "How do I know? Didn't you tell me that there was nothing there? Nothing down there? In the cellar?"
Check out my two short stories, now published on Amazon Kindle:
Dell had noticed
it the first time he ate at the Dilly Dally Diner. It could only be seen from
the tiny booth that could seat just two, the booth a seeming afterthought of
the diner’s original owner, now surely long dead. The shape clung to the aging
yellowed wallpaper, never changing but seeming more prevalent with each visit.
originally patronized the diner for no other reason than to satiate his
hunger.Dell worked not a block away,
but hadn’t really noticed the diner until one particularly blustery day. He
remembered his first visit vividly; the cold, bitter March weather supplanted
by the warm interior of the Dilly Dally, smelling of strong coffee and frying
eggs with just an underlying hint of mold and dirty vinyl flooring. It wasn’t
really a nice place, but it felt safe; unchanging, yet somehow sentient. He
thought often of that first day, which was probably more of a miss-memory,
since it ran in a loop through his mind, becoming more and more embellished as
it spun out into the silent, bleak hours of night, a familiar haunt. Not wholly
welcome or unwelcome; just there.
He would eat
his lunch there daily in the midafternoon, around two o’clock, excepting Sunday
when they were closed. The tiny booth was always empty, waiting. Dell used to
worry that it would one day be occupied, but as the months went by, he’d
forgotten his worry. There were few patrons that time of day, and the booth was
situated in such a tight, dim location that it would be considered a last
resort for most.
He was often
alone in the diner by two-thirty; the Dilly Dally closed at three-thirty, no
longer offering an evening menu. This Yonkers neighborhood was slowly fading
around him. The stores and offices were blinking out of existence, but Dell barely
noticed. The diner remained. The booth remained. The stain on the wall, close
up to the ceiling, above the bakery display case smeared with the fingerprints
of children, remained.
like a squirrel to him. It was a
squirrel. It was as if Michelangelo himself had lain on a scaffold and lovingly
rendered the animal in rich sepia tones. It wasn’t a water stain. Nor a blot of
grease left by a careless cleaning crew decades ago, as he’d first imagined.
Dell knew for a fact this was a true acheiropoieta if there ever was one. An
image most definitely not created by human hands. But it was more than
that.Every day he sat and admired the
squirrel as he dutifully ate his dry turkey on rye sandwich, chewing as slowly
as possible so as to be able to man his booth as long as he could. He had at
some time realized this odd pilgrimage was somehow his destiny, even before the
squirrel spoke to him.
“I know you
can see me,” said a voice in a conversational tone, quiet and delicate, definitely
male. Dell jerked erect, spilling his coffee onto his half eaten sandwich.
that?” asked Dell much too loudly, startled, as he eyed the couple who had been
arguing a booth over, nothing left of their lunch but scrunched napkins and
warm half full glasses of cola. The bald man with the neck tattoo gave him a
cool look as his lady friend with too much makeup and too little clothing grabbed
her leather jacket and rose to leave. Dell quickly averted his gaze and slid
down in his seat.
from the corner of his eye as the couple exited the diner, gulped air and then
looked up at his squirrel.
Dell,” said the little creature, “you’ll get yourself tossed out of here for
one can hear me but you, and your God has nothing to do with it, I’m afraid.”
it. I’ve gone nuts,” Dell whispered.
sir? Would you like a fresh coffee? I’d be happy to…”
thank you. I’ve had enough. Please may I have the bill?” Dell said to the
waitress, his voice a quiver, never taking his eyes from his squirrel on the
middle-aged woman looked at Dell quizzically, handed him his bill from the
black folder she carried in her apron. She lethargically waddled back through
the double swinging doors into the diner’s meager kitchen.He watched through the pass-through window as
she talked to the cook, both darting glances in his direction. Dell’s attention
was drawn back to his squirrel, who winked at him.
miracles never cease, eh, Dell? Now on home with you. You’ve had enough for
today. I’ll still be here tomorrow. I always am, aren’t I?”
blurred then refocused; he shook his head and stood quickly, ramming one chubby
thigh into the table top. He tossed twelve dollars on the table. He almost left
his jacket behind in his haste to leave, his mind still in a fog, yet once he
was outside in the bright light of a June afternoon, his mind cleared.
He knew what
had happened. His reverence of the curious stain had lulled him to sleep. He had
dozed. Yes, that was it. He had dozed off for a moment and dreamed. Dreamed of
a talking squirrel. This something that had become his own, this secret image
of a small woodland creature, seen only by him, had invaded his dreamscape. He
would be back tomorrow, he told himself, and he would still see the image, but
he’d prove to himself that it hadn’t spoken to him. How could it have? Dell
caught the bus and headed home, not returning to his job. He’d call and tell
them he’d become ill.
from the bus stop in a daze, climbed the four flights of stairs to his floor;
he’d barely noticed that he’d buzzed himself in. He’d barely noticed the young man
passed out on the ratty tan couch that sat in the foyer. (“Now, quiet Dell.”) Dell
let himself into his one bedroom apartment. He threw his jacket through the
open bedroom door onto his neatly made bed. (“…your God has nothing to do with
it, I’m afraid.”) He completely forgot about calling work.
apartment was neat, clean and tidy, just as his cubicle was at Walker
Accounting. Walker Accounting, where he crunched numbers and filed reports. His
apartment walls were as void of pictures and decoration as his cubicle. His
life was just as purposely unadorned. Dell tried his best not to revisit the
past or worry about the future. He just was. He didn’t like complication.
Didn’t like confrontation. Dell had made it through grade school, high school
and community college with his head down, ears and eyes open. He’d survived,
and planned on continuing to survive without any outward influence; any trouble.
That is until the squirrel.(“I’ll still be here tomorrow. I always am, aren’t I?”)
himself a can of Coke from the fridge, kicked off his brown loafers and sat on
the arm of his black leather coach, gazing down the street through the sliding
glass doors that opened to a concrete patio. The crumbling gray asphalt and
broken concrete sidewalk lay in strong contrast to nature’s clear blue sky. The
sun warmed his face and arms, bringing a much welcomed feeling of numbness. His
doughy face reflected in the glass. He thought his reflection looked worse than
he imagined himself to look, an image that even in his mind’s eye wasn’t
He sat and thought
about his life, thoughts that he usually avoided, blocked out of his conscious
mind, but memories flooded back like so much murky, putrid water. Life for Dell
had been one continuous dull pain, like a terminal stubbed toe.There had been good times. Times when the sun
broke through the gloom, but Dell knew that sooner than later the clouds would
roll in. The rain would come. The throb of pain would resurface; an ache that
settled deep into his very being. Not the ache of guilt or remorse. It was the
hurt of resentment, the anguish of paranoia; although Dell couldn’t quite grasp
his torment in those terms.
been bullied in school. He hadn’t been so much as noticed. He hadn’t been
abused by his parents, but merely tolerated, he thought. He had no siblings to
torment him, no rivalry with others. He had just been - detached. Dell didn’t quite have the personality to develop many
friendships and when the few friends he did have gave up on him, he made it a
point to have no more. It was too painful when the rain came and the more often
it came, the longer it lingered.
Mother had lost her temper with him and berated him over the phone: “You’re so
negative!” she exclaimed, “too sensitive!” That was four years ago. He hadn’t
talked to her or Dad since. They called, he didn’t answer. Last year the calls had
stopped. Shows how much they really care,
Dell thought. People forget who you are; that
you just might be as human as they are. He decided that they looked at him
as if he were the stain. As if he was
almost alive, but not quite.
compelled to spend the remainder of the afternoon writing down his experiences
at the diner. It seemed important. It added clarity to the sequence of events. Dell
feared he may slip into madness without this record, this outlet. Some way to
remind himself that he was still part of the real world, starting with the day he’d
first seen the stain. Hours later, he laid aside the spiral notebook, setting
the stub of a pencil on top, his wrist aching, fingers stiff and red. Rubbing
his eyes, smudging graphite on his cheek, Dell stumbled to his bedroom. He went
to bed, fully clothed, soon asleep.
in the early hours of morning. It was still dark outside. He was more than a little
disgusted, falling asleep, fully clothed, not having had dinner or even
brushing his teeth. It wasn’t like him at all. Dell was an orderly person.
There was a time and place for everything. A place for his few books. A place
for his shoes. His shirts hung in his closet in a specific order; all twelve of
them, and he knew there were exactly twelve. The food in his refrigerator
always separated by type. He even knew the ‘sell buy’ date on his half empty
quart of milk. He was more than just disgusted. He was frightened. He needed
order in his life. Order kept the chaos out. Kept the chaotic thoughts at bay.
his cellphone out of his jacket pocket which lay on the floor, having kicked it
off his bed during his restless slumber. It bothered him that he hadn’t plugged
it in to recharge. The battery symbol had turned to red for the first time. It
was unsettling. He called work to leave a message that he wouldn’t be in today.
He hadn’t ever called off before and didn’t feel comfortable about doing so,
but he knew that he couldn’t go in. Couldn’t wait until two o’clock, couldn’t
wait for his lunch hour. Dell left a message. He waited for the recorded voice
to let him know that his message had been received and forwarded to the proper
department. Satisfied, Dell pulled the phone from his ear. Just as he was about
to push “end,” a quiet voice could be heard, “Come in Dell. I’m waiting.” He
dropped the phone on the carpeted floor. He left it there. He quickly got
himself around and headed for the bus stop.
On the bus,
headed uptown, sitting towards the back, arms crossed in his lap, shoulders
hunched, Dell worried. Worried about what was left of his life. Something had
happened. It had spoken to him on the phone. The squirrel. He knew in that
instant that there was no way back to his old, comfortable world. He didn’t
know if that were good or bad. It would
almost be exciting if it didn’t worry him so.
His life had been comfortable the last eight
years since graduating college, unburdened for the most part. His isolation
kept it that way. It almost felt that time had stood still, just the television
shows changed. He was even able to deny that he was aging, most of the time. A
memory, unbidden, came to mind, a childhood memory. His Father had brought home
a large box from the warehouse where he worked. Dell remembered that his mother
had wanted one to store clothing in. She’d made a big fuss over how the box was
too big and how his Father was an idiot for bringing it home. He had covered
his five-year-old ears as she berated his Father, who left the house without a
word. Dell remembered finding him asleep in his truck the next day. He didn’t
dare wake him. The box was never mentioned between his parents again. Dell’s
Mother put it in his room. “It’s yours,
Dell. It can be anything you want it to be, silly.” And it was. Dell spent the
whole of that summer in the box. Time stood still.
the bus two stops before Dell’s. Two
teenaged boys, dressed in the typical urban teen uniform of loose fitting
jeans, t-shirt and sneakers. Laughing and pushing each other, they sat down on
the hard plastic seats. One on each side of the near empty bus, feet up on the
seat beside them, both with arms crossed, their backs leaning against the
chrome railings that stood bolted from floor to ceiling. The boys’ boisterous conversation
shot back and forth between them, studded with curse words. The bigger of the
two, probably no more than fifteen, drummed his feet on the seat, laughing
loudly at the older boy’s commentary. Dell looked past them at the other
passengers, three men nearer his own age. One had his eyes closed, obviously
feigning sleep, the second, a tattooed biker type gazed out the bus windows
over his shoulder and the last, dressed in a cheap suit and tie, concentrated
so hard on the newspaper gripped in his hand that Dell almost expected it to
burst into flame. He took a quick look from one teen to the other, noticing the
crude tattoos on the older boy’s knuckles (LOVE HATE) and then found himself
concentrating on a crumpled silver gum wrapper that bounced to and fro on the
floor from the vibration of the bus tires on broken asphalt.
you say?” one of the boys exclaimed.
that small ball of foil as it worked its way back and forth over the grimy
floor, pulling his shoulders up to his ears, reciting, “one more stop,” over
and over in his head like a mantra, a magic spell, the piece of foil a talisman.
Nothing,” said Dell, keeping his eyes downcast. He began to shake, bending over
further in his seat, squeezing his eyes shut, his empty stomach tightening like
a fist. He waited with a sickening anticipation for the first blow; the first
thrust of blade.
wrong with you? What’s wrong with that dude, Kyle?”
wrong with you, motherfucker?”
named Kyle guffawed, drumming his feet on the seat next to him. Dell could feel
the violent vibrations run up his spine.
“Look at him
shake! Think he’s crazy?” said the Kyle boy.
leave me alone!”
“Man, he is
nuts. Come on.”
the boy’s shuffling feet on the gritty floor. He held his breath and drew his
feet up, knees to his chest. The brakes of the bus wheezed, the sudden
deceleration nearly tossing him off of his seat. He heard the bus doors open,
his heart in his throat. He should make a run for it, he thought, but he
didn’t. He didn’t move at all. He wanted everything to just end; he wanted to
rattled shut. The bus accelerated with a jerk. Dell realized he was quietly
crying; sniffling. He opened one eye in a squint. The boys were gone. They’d
gotten off at the stop. His stop. Dell composed himself as best he could,
wiping his wet eyes and running nose on the sleeve of his jacket. The man with
the paper was gone as well. The biker sat smirking, still looking out the bus
window. The sleeper was still sleeping.
passengers had been picked up, a mother with a small boy with a bad cough and
three teenaged girls, whispering and giggling between themselves. Dell’s face
burned red. He knew the girls were mocking him. They’d seen him cowering from
the boys that were nearly their age. A grown man, afraid to stand up to a
couple of punks, they thought. An ugly little man. Look at the old perv, said one in a whisper. He couldn’t quite make
it out, but he knew, he knew. And what about the three men who ignored his
plight? Had they stood up to the punks? Had they come to his aid? The biker
with all his false bravado? The businessman who found the morning’s lead story
oh, so engrossing? The ‘sleeper’ who would’ve told the police, “I didn’t see
nothing, officer.” If Dell had… well, things would’ve been different, if he had
a second chance.
Dell got off
at the next stop and walked his way back to the Dilly Dally, weak in the knees.
The green wooden double doors of the restaurant, glass panes glistening in the
late morning sun, beckoned Dell inside. The stale warm air comforted him like a
blanket. He glanced quickly round, making sure that the boys from the bus hadn’t
somehow found the diner and lay in waiting.
Reassured, Dell walked back to his corner
booth. He slipped into the dimly lit corner, refusing to look up. He stared at
his hands folded in his lap. Why had he come? What was he expecting? He should
be at work. This wasn’t right. His Mother would think him mad for even
considering what was spiraling through his mind. He could almost see her face
sour with disapproval. He decided he’d order toast and coffee, then be off to
work. He’d tell them he’d got to feeling better. He’d just not look at it.
Dell noticed movement out of the corner of
his eye. He turned, mouth open, ready to address the waitress, when he realized
it was another patron taking a seat in the adjacent booth. A man in khaki pants
and a blue windbreaker jacket. He looked at Dell. Dell snapped his mouth shut;
the stranger looked away, opening a newspaper he’d brought with him. Dell
recognized him. He had seen this man when scoping out the restaurant just
minutes ago, sitting on a stool at the counter. Although he’d only seen him
from the back, he knew it was the same guy by his close cropped haircut and
muscular build. He was in the place just about as regular as Dell; always sat
at the counter, until today; always flirted with the same waitress that waited
on Dell. ‘Mr. Clean-cut’ Dale had named him, just as he’d named the waitress
‘Miss. Lonely-heart’. She wore a nametag, but Dale never bothered to remember
her name. Why should he, he thought.
“You can’t ignore me forever, Dale. You
came to see me, remember? Wanted to
see me. Look at me!” commanded the little brown creature.
“Shhhhh,” said Dale, drawing the attention
of Mr. Clean-cut. Dale looked up at the squirrel while at the same time,
watched the man in the booth next to him in his peripheral vision.
“Dell, no one can hear me but you,
remember? Isn’t that grand? You’re staring. Take a picture, it’ll last longer!”
said the impossible animal, ending with a twitter that set Dell’s teeth on edge.
The waitress appeared at the booth across
from his. Dell used her presence as an excuse to break eye contact with his
squirrel, looking down at her no-nonsense work shoes and back at his hands that
strangled each other in his lap. He sat and listened while she flirted with Mr.
Clean-cut. She’d barely even acknowledge Dell’s existence when she took his
order, he thought, which was always the same; turkey on rye with coffee. No, no
lettuce or tomato, or mayo thank you. It infuriated him. It hadn’t ever before,
but today, well it infuriated him to no end. How Dell was beginning to hate
this place and everyone in it. But it didn’t matter. He came now for only one
reason: his secret.
“Yes, I am your secret, Dell. Yours and
yours alone and I know we’re going to become good friends. Right Dell?”
“I… I guess so,” whispered Dell.
“Did you say somethin’ hun?” asked the
portly Miss. Lonely-heart.
“Um, I’ll have my usual,” he said.
“And what’s that, hun?”
like reminding her that he came here five days a week and ordered the same
thing every time, and that she must be some kind of chowder head for not
knowing that, and that if she expected to be tipped… but he just gave his order
and waited for her to leave him in peace.
“Chowder head? You mean class ‘A’ bitch,
am I right?” said his squirrel, “and don’t answer that aloud, idiot. You don’t
need to sputter at me for me to hear you.”
I am not an idiot, and I don’t sputter, thought Dale.
“That a boy. Sorry about that buddy, but
you’re attracting unwanted attention, if you get my drift.” The little furry
animal cast eyes in the direction of Mr. Clean-cut. It would’ve been comical,
thought Dell, if it weren’t so surreal.
Dell’s lunch was soon set before him with
little care. The waitress was back flirting with the man in the next booth.
Dale thought the man’s toothy grin reminded him of a shark, cold and dangerous.
That brought back uncomfortable thoughts of the bus ride.
“Those boys on the bus have you worried,
kiddo? You know, I really enjoy your company. I’d hate to think you might not
come back because of those boys. You should do something about it.”
How would you know about… started Dell.
“I know a lot about you, my boy. There’s a
reason why you can see me and no one else can Dell. I’ve chosen you to see me.
You’re special, Dell. Not like the others; callous in their disbelief. You
truly see things as they are. See people
as they really are; barren and shallow, am I right? Well, I want to be your
friend. We are friends, aren’t we Dell? So, what should we do about it?”
“About those hooligans, you numb… Dell,”
said the squirrel, raising his tiny squirrel voice. It actually frightened Dell
quite a bit, but then the little thing was all honey and molasses once again. “I
think you need to protect yourself, my friend. You need to buy yourself a gun.
Have you ever shot a gun, Dell?” asked his Squirrel.
Once in summer camp. It was…
“I know all about that. It wasn’t your
fault, Dell. The boy lived. No harm, no foul, am I right?”
I’d forgotten all about that. I know it wasn’t my fault. My Mother said
it was. No more camp for me. It was actually a relief. God, why am I remembering
“Don’t say that word.”
Crap? Dale didn’t understand, but he’d
watch his manners. He really did need a friend, even if it was an animated
stain on a wall. And that’s all his squirrel was, wasn’t it?
“Stop thinking like that. Concentrate
Dell. Those boys. You know they’re still out there. Still a threat, and I know
I don’t want any harm coming to you, my friend. Get a gun. There’s a gun shop
just eight blocks up on Union. Six hundred dollars and a little paperwork and
you’re good to go.”
can’t see as I really…
“Get. The. Gun. Trust me, buddy, you’re
going to need it. You must admit I can see a lot more than you can. Do it.” His
squirrel seemed very adamant, impatient and practically rude about it.
next thing Dell knew, he was headed towards Union Street. Dell had decided to
buy the gun. If nothing else, it would be a new experience for him. It would
almost be exciting if it didn’t worry him so.
He’d had to
deal with the waiting period, and thought more than once about calling and
canceling the order. But the worry left him once he had the pistol, slick with
gun oil, loaded (he’d ducked into an alley way and nervously fumbled with the
bullets, a rush of adrenaline turning his fear into excitement), tucked in a
box, tucked in a bag emblazoned: SANDER’S GUN PRO INC. He hurried to the bus
station, heading for home. He hadn’t been to work in a week. They hadn’t
called, he hadn’t cared. Dell sprinted up the four flights of stairs to his
apartment. He never took the elevator; wouldn’t consider it. Three full minutes
trapped alone with a stranger was something to be avoided as much as humanly possible.
Mrs. Quigley, his next door neighbor,
stood in the hallway, as if waiting for him. Dell knew it must be a
coincidence, that he was coming as she was going, but it startled him none the
less. He covered the package by holding it against his chest while digging in
his pocket for his keys.
“How nice to see you Dell. How are things
at the hospital?” she asked, peering cheerily at him through bi-focal glasses,
her gray wig slightly askew, dressed in a Hello
Kitty sweat-suit. Dell thought she looked like a kid dressed as an old lady
“A little crazy. You know how it can be
for a Res,” said Dell, having found his key and now concentrating on shoving it
into the keyhole. When he had started the lie about being a Resident Physician
he couldn’t remember.
“I noticed you’ve been home lately. Not to
“My Mother’s been sick, is all. Taking some
time off. Helping her out, you know.”
looked at him like she didn’t know, but Dell finally got his door open, and
headed into his apartment.
“Nice to see you, Dell. Take good care of
your mother,” she said.
Dell simply closed the door in her face,
then watched through the peep-hole until Mrs. Quigley shuffled out of site. He
laid the bag containing the box containing the gun on his bed. He didn’t want
it anymore. He didn’t like what was happening to him.Dell wasn’t a participant in life, he was an
observer. A watcher. What was he doing with a gun? A week ago he wouldn’t even
have been able to imagine going into a gun shop, let alone buying a gun. It was
the squirrel. He hadn’t been back to the diner in a week, and even though he hadn’t
been conscious of it, he had been avoiding the place on purpose. He told
himself he hadn’t wanted to attempt it unarmed, but he’d made the trip to and
from the gun shop twice. Maybe he didn’t need to go back. He’d take back the
gun tomorrow. He’d see if he still had a job, and if not, look for another. Dell
made himself a frozen dinner and watched the news. He fell asleep on the couch.
Dell awoke, bleary eyed and confused. He
could hear a voice spouting nonsense about tile floors. He realized the voice
was a pitchman in an infomercial on his TV. He groped for the remote and
clicked off the set. He fell onto his bed and attempted to escape back into
sleep. As he drifted, he could hear a skittering noise somewhere in the room.
Sleep overcame him.
The early summer sun shone red through
Dell’s eyelids. As much as he desperately wanted to remain sleeping, the sun
stubbornly kept intruding. He sighed and stretched, his body racked with aches
and pains. Dell rubbed the sleep from his eyes and then sat on the edge of the
bed. His blinds were open. He normally pulled them down tight, but he slowly
began to remember that he’d stumbled into his room groggily from the couch.
Dell used the bathroom, then splashed cold water on his face and hair, slicking
his hair back in an effort to tame it. Looking into the mirror, Dell was
shocked at how white his complexion was and how dark, bruised and hollow were
his eyes. He looked sick. More than sick. He looked nearly dead. As he stared
into the mirror, he noticed something else; something perplexing if not
disturbing. A dark spot on the bedroom wall. The wall that was at the head of
Dell went to the spot. He had to climb
onto his bed on his knees to examine it. It was a hole through the plaster
board. A hole about three inches in diameter. A ragged hole. It looked to Dell
as if a rat had clawed its way through. Not from inside the room, but from
behind the wall. He could see small lacerations in the plaster there. The
thought of sharp bloodied teeth and claws came to mind. Bits of plaster
littered his sheets; his pillow. Then, squinting, Dell saw the writing. Tiny
writing. Tiny brown writing in a sepia tone. It said: ‘In this hole lives the
Wicker King. Kill for my Master. I turn children into Killers.’ It wasn’t in
Dell’s handwriting. He wished to God it was, but it wasn’t. Dell backed out of
the bedroom, closing the door after him. He couldn’t understand it. Kill for
who? Who’s children? He’d been a child once. Was he still one? How had he
allowed this to happen? His world had been turned upside down, ransacked. Somehow
he’d allowed a hole to be poked in his reality, and there was no way to mend
it. Something wrong was leaking through.
Dell sat on his cracked concrete patio on
his one molded-plastic chair, drinking hot black coffee, trying to breathe some
life into his fatigued body. He watched the cars roll by below; he could smell
the exhaust fumes as their owners fought for position in the morning’s rush
hour. He’d made up his mind. He would return the gun to the gun shop, then see
if he still had a job. He’d decided he wouldn’t sleep here another night. He’d
call his parents and hope they’d give him a place to stay for a while. Dell
gathered his nerve and retrieved the bulky package from his bedroom, once again
closing the door behind him.
Soon he was on the bus. The bus was
crowded, but it actually made him feel safer. He was just another anonymous
commuter. Dell sat as the bus jostled him along, lulling him. The bus was too
warm. He guessed the driver thought the weather was still too mild to run the
air. Soon he was asleep, drifting in and out of consciousness. (“Dell, get the
gun.”) He awoke in a panic. Had he missed his stop? Where was his package
(GUN)? Dell stood, grasping the sticky chrome pole nearest him. He looked
frantically around. The bag (GUN) was gone. The bus braked, pitching him into
the man next to him. “Watch it, bud.”
stammered Dell, “my stop.”
for you, guy,” said the middle-aged man in the too small tweed jacket.
Dell was off the bus. He shoved his hands
in his jacket pockets, a jacket that felt much too warm as the clear summer sky
shown down on him. The gun was in his right pocket. It wasn’t a big gun, “good
for a beginner”, said the clerk in the gun shop, “Plenty lethal though.
Excellent for self-defense.” What would he do without the receipt? Hopefully
the guy who sold him the gun would remember him. If not, he’d sell it
somewhere. A pawn shop or something. Dell walked towards Union Street.
The next he knew, Dell stood just within
the deep green doors of the diner. He realized eyes were upon him. How long had
he been standing there? He slinked towards the back of the restaurant, shoes
shuffling on gritty linoleum. He slid into his tiny booth tucked in the
shadowed corner. Dell realized he was sweating. He realized he had his hand in
his jacket pocket, wrapped around the pistol grip, finger on the trigger of his
gun. Dell didn’t even try to avoid it. He looked up at the squirrel.
“Dell! Happy to see you! Almost thought
you’d changed your mind, but I was pretty sure you’d come. You are my only friend,
after all. You did have me worried though. However, I know where you live,” it
said, moving slightly down the wall, its tiny sharp nailed paws scrabbling on
the yellowed wallpaper. Dale quickly glanced around. No one was the wiser. The
smattering of customers continued with their benign conversations and senseless
“You! You came to my apartment, you…
squirrel. Those words…”
“Shhhhh… Dell, remember what I told you.
Don’t speak aloud! You’ll spoil everything,” it said bearing its sharp, yellowed
teeth, brown eyes now rimmed with red. “And the name is Harvey. It wasn’t I who
wrote those words. The whole picture captures much more than just you and I.”
done with you, thought Dale, his shaking hand threatening to draw the
weapon from his pocket.
“Oh, but I think not. I need you Dell. You
need me. You see me. Validate me. You’re on a different wave length from
everyone else. You know it as well as me.”
Dell broke eye contact from the thing and
brought his fist down on the table. The silverware set on the white paper
napkin bounced and rattled. Dell drew a deep breath through his nose and
exhaled with a sob through his mouth. The waitress for his section appeared
seemingly out of nowhere.
“What can I getcha hun?”
“A coffee. Just coffee Miss. Lonely…,” he
“What was that? You okay fella?”
“A coffee please,” he struggled to read
her name tag, “Lucy.”
“Sure. Okay. Coffee. Whatever flips your
He watched her waddle away. He swabbed his
face with the paper napkin, pieces of it remaining in the stubble of his
unshaven face. He watched as she paused at the counter to flirt with Mr.
Clean-cut. He hadn’t been there before. Dell checked his watch. Two o’clock,
his old lunch hour. Where had the time gone? The missing time put him further
“Hey, buddy boy. Don’t be rude to your
lunch date. I’m still up here, you know.”
don’t you come down here? Thought Dell.
“Oh, you wouldn’t want that. Anyway, you
need to relax. As I was saying, this thing is bigger than me and you. It’s
beyond our control. So, let’s just let it be, okay? Truce?”
Dell hadn’t been listening to the machinations
of the little beast. He’d been watching Mr. Clean-cut. Mr. Clean-cut as he
finished his coffee and got up off the red padded stool. Mr. Clean-cut who
strolled towards the back of the diner, towards Dell. Who slid into the booth
next to Dell. Who opened the folded newspaper that he’d carried tucked under
his muscled arm. Dell watched no more. He withdrew his hand from his pocket and
clasped hands on the table, now littered with his jumbled silverware and used
napkin. Every muscle in Dell’s body was as taut as a piano wire. He wanted to
leave, but felt if he tried, he’d run screaming into the street. Miss. Lonely
Heart brought the coffee and sat it before him with a clunk, without a word.
Coffee sloshed onto the tabletop, a rivulet making a beeline for his jacket sleeve.
Dell let the coffee soak in.
“Well isn’t that the be all? What are you,
Dell? Really? What are you? Chopped liver? A doormat? Look at you, sitting
there. You lost your job. Your parents hate you. People walk all over you.
You’re intimidated by children, for fuck’s sake. I’m ashamed of you. Your only
friend, someone who’s tried to help you out, totally and completely ashamed. I
have to hand it to you though, you did find the balls to buy that gun. A gun; you
know, a gun is a great equalizer, Dell. As a friend I can tell you, that’s what
you need, an equalizer. Bring these idiots down a notch or two. Show them who’s
boss for once. Look. She’s coming back. Now’s your chance. Teach her a lesson,
The last screeching sentence from the
creature’s mouth snapped Dell into action. He went for the gun. It wasn’t like
the movies; the hammer of the gun caught on the lining of his jacket, Dell
struggled to free it, panicking, as she drew nearer, step by step. With much
effort, Dell tore the gun free, his finger squeezing the trigger before the gun
was even fully out of his jacket pocket. The report of the first shot exploded
in his ear louder than he could’ve ever imagined, the bullet plugging a neat
hole through the linoleum covered floor. He aimed the gun for the next shot,
but the terrified woman was already diving behind a booth just up from his.
Aiming for her head, he took another shot. The sound was terrific. Red
blossomed on her shoulder as she dropped behind the booth.
“Drop your weapon!”
Dell shrunk back from the bellow,
instinctively putting up his hands in a defensive motion, elbows crooked, gun
now pointing towards the ceiling. He slowly turned his head. Mr. Clean-cut
“Police! Drop the gun! NOW!”
could see was the officer’s weapon trained on him. All he could think to say
“Harvey told me to,” pointing high up on the
wall. Dell put the gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger.
Officer Nathaniel Casey stayed through the
crime scene investigation. The detectives wanted him available if they needed
to ask him any further questions. All he could think about was that he was
truly glad that Lucy had noticed the strange behavior of the shooter over the
course of the last few weeks. She’d always considered him an oddball, she’d
said, but the last few weeks he’d started talking to himself and seemed
Nathaniel couldn’t have been happier with
the outcome, especially since his handling of the situation had been exemplary.
He’d even been told by the EMT’s that Lucy wouldn’t have made it without his
medical assistance. Surely that would bode well for him with his current circumstance,
as he was under review for misappropriation of evidence. They’d never pin the
charge on him anyway. Sure, he took the drugs and sold them, but so did a lot
of guys. Nobody could be expected to live on his salary.
Nathaniel thought about what the guy had
said before blowing his brains out, ‘Harvey told me to’. The weird part was how
the guy had gestured towards the wall. High up on the wall. He leaned over the
bloodstained seat of the tiny two seat booth. There was a stain there. It
looked like a squirrel. No, it was a
squirrel. The officer lost track of time.
Check out my two short stories, now published on Amazon Kindle: